Greetings from Canada! I arrived safe and sound on Sunday afternoon and passed through immigration without mishap and into the loving arms of Sara at the arrivals gate. As it’s Stampede time we were also serenaded by a country band so what could be more fitting.
We managed to manhandle my excess baggage into her car and with great excitement I finally got to see my new pad. I love it! It’s weird suddenly going from 1 bed in W12 to a whole house with an upstairs and a basement in Calgary and right now it’s sporting a minimalist look but once my furniture etc arrives I’m sure we will fill it up. It’s got all mod cons and lovely garden from which I’ve already enjoyed a rhubarb crumble made by Sara. And now it’s got a very fancy toaster too! I couldn’t resist this one when I saw what buttons it had: I’m calling it the Gina G toaster.
I ended up posting my kettle a week or so in advance, padding the box with Yorkshire tea. I feared my package might get intercepted as the least subtle drugs deal ever but as it was it arrived unscathed. I also brought a few other essentials to make the kitchen more homely:
Sara has been fab driving me around to pick whatever else I need to get settled in. On Monday we were inside when the most incredible hailstorm broke out. The noise on the roof of the shopping centre was like a stampede of horses and we later saw hailstones on the ground that were the size of marbles and upwards. This did an enormous amount of damage across town (including my bedroom window!). The bonnet and roof of Sara’s car is dented in multiple places and this amazing video shows every window in a University of Calgary greenhouse getting smashed in under a minute.
It doesn’t take much effort, the blogging. But it certainly takes more than I’ve been able to spare these last few weeks so apologies for the scarcity of updates. My mental bandwidth has been maxed out with preparations for moving back to Canada, with work, selling my flat and visiting as many people as possible.
Now I’m in my empty, denuded flat and it’s only 3 days to go before I leave for Calgary and a whole new world. Let’s see what’s in my diary for this weekend…
Yeah - that’s about right!
In the last few weeks I’ve been on a grand tour through some of the most charming parts of this country. I finally made it up to Straiton in Ayrshire to see the magnificent Masons and their lovely collection of animals (ponies, sheep, chickens, cats and dogs with gorgeous puppies). I’ve also been to glorious Dorset (twice!), Oxford, Newmarket and assorted parts of Suffolk which has been a real treat. I had a leaving party at the wonderful South London Pacific last weekend and there’ll be TW drinks this Friday. At all these events I’ve been thinking of this as a chance to see people not as a time to say goodbye. Goodbye seems too terminal, too final when that simply isn’t the case. I may be moving to Canada for good but I still hope to come back for visits, to receive visitors in Canada and to stay in touch through the magic of the interwebs. So it’s not goodbye - this thing ain’t over - it’s much more like au revoir!
Throughout my recent tour of friends and family there’s been no escaping what a sensationally beautiful country this is, what great friends I have, and what a wonderful and caring family I am lucky enough to be a part of. I came back from Canada because I missed all of that. On coming back I found that all of that was as special and as important as I recalled but I realised that none of it mattered as much as being with Sara. I can leave now because I know exactly what it is I’m leaving behind. I’m going because I love her and I want to be with her, not because I don’t want to be here. It’s a hard thing to express but my cousin Catherine found that somebody else had already captured the emotion perfectly:
From The Wind in the Willows by Kenneth Grahame
The weary Mole was also glad to turn in without delay, and soon he had his head on his pillow in great joy and contentment. But ere he closed his eyes he let them wander round his old room, mellow in the glow of the firelight that played or rested on familiar and friendly things which had long been unconsciously a part of him, and now smilingly received him back, without rancour….
…He saw clearly how plain and simple…it all was; but clearly too how much it all meant to him, and the special value of some such anchorage in one’s existence. He did not at all want to abandon the new life and it’s splendid spaces, to turn his back on sun and air and all they offered him and creep home and stay there: the upper world was all too strong, it called to him still, even down there, and he knew that he must return to the larger stage. But it was good to think he had this to come back to, this place that was all his own, these things that were so glad to see him again and could always be counted upon for the same simple welcome.
It was my 40th birthday on Friday and my 40th birthday party on Saturday. Right now I’m sitting at home on Sunday night looking back at a wonderful weekend.
The first treat was Sara’s arrival. Just like at Christmas she arrived to be my best possible present on the big day itself. We just relaxed on Friday because Saturday was going to be a big day. As I only intend to be 40 once and as this is going to be a momentous year with my move to Canada I really wanted to have a big bash. First thing on the agenda was to find the right venue and I had my heart set on the Bush Hall, a mere 5mins walk from my front door. Bush Hall is a wonderful venue. I love it because from the street it looks like nothing at all. Then you walk inside it’s like some kind of punk Versailles - all chandeliers, plaster and red velvet curtains.
Next up was some sort of live entertainment. I’ve been lucky enough to meet some very talented people over the years so I put the word out to anyone who wanted to do a turn. I have to say my friends really came through for me. Mark Dolan agreed to MC the evening and did the perfect job in hosting the show. Jamie Reid was the opening act and did a wonderful country-influenced solo acoustic set: it was great to hear him singing again. Then came some comedy. Glen Long did a brilliant stand-up set musing on ageing and the passing of time. The fabulous Madeleine Brolly then did her Lady Ada Vader cabaret act (ex-wife of Darth, got the Death Star in the divorce settlement, now doing “Earth Magic” to earn £££ - usual sort of thing…) and that went down a storm. After a brief interval the irrepressible Andy Walker did his first stand-up act for 12 years and it was a characteristic tour-de-force from the man I always refer to as the funniest man I’ve ever met. The final act of the night was the magnificent Kate Dimbleby and her band. Kate is an amazing singer and I was thrilled that she offered to perform. I was even more thrilled when she agreed to do a duet with me. You see I’ve done lots of showbiz over the years but I’ve never sung on stage with a band: in the end I had to book my own venue and event to do it! We sang one of my all time favourites “Mr Inbetween” (aka Accentuate the Positive, Eliminate the Negative) where I was Bing Crosby (hem hem) to her Andrews Sisters. Even though I say so myself I thought it went really well and it was a huge thrill to do. There’s even a video of the finale (Thanks Chris).
There was also a great turn out of friends and family which is what made the event really special. I was so happy to be able to introduce Sara to so many people in one go and she coped amazingly with the this avalanche of new names and faces. I can’t say any more than everything about the evening surpassed my expectations (not least the food from Fait Maison on the Goldhawk Road) and it was one of the most fun nights of my life. And I haven’t even got round to talking about dancing with Sandra Oh and Kevin McKidd from Grey’s Anatomy. It was fab.
It’s clear that I’ve been in a bit of a blog blackout for a while. The reason for that is simple: I’ve been knackered. Mostly to knackered too do anything interesting and then if I have, certainly too knackered to write about it afterwards. Most of this year I’ve found work mentally very tiring leaving me pretty flaked out in the evenings. And then the rest of my energy has been going towards organising a 40th birthday party, selling my house and moving to Canada. Target date for that is July so time is hastening on.
A few weeks ago I went back to Oxford to look at some of the stuff I have in storage. I was aware I have quite a lot of documents and pictures in a big suitcase from my mother’s side of the family and I wanted to see what was there. Having retrieved said suitcase from the storage unit I went round to my Aunt Anne’s to see what we would see. It’s quite a treasure trove - especially of watercolours and drawings done by my great-grandfather on his grand tour to Egypt and the middle east in the 1890s (I think). The most interesting file however belonged to my grandfather. He had been a latin teacher and housemaster at Eton during WW1 and the 20s/30s. On opening the file the very first thing I picked up was a handwritten poem called “The Three Beggars”. In another large hand at the top was written E.A.Blair. Eric Arthur Blair I wondered?? George Orwell??
I asked my aunt if she was aware of any connection between by grandfather and Orwell but she wasn’t. When I got home however I got on the google and made some interesting discoveries. It turns out Orwell was a Kings Scholar at Eton. As a Kings Scholar he would have been under the care of the Master in College of the time. And who was the Master in College at that time: J.F.Crace my grandfather! Not only that I found a website called Orwell Today which showed a photograph of a book entitled The Unknown Orwell. The front cover of that book was a school photo which identified which of the white faced and bow-tied young men was Orwell. I recognised the photo used as I found an original copy in my grandfather’s file. There’s young George and there is Mr Crace in the front row:
Click here to see which one is George. You can guess who grandfather is on your own…
I found quite a few other similar photos. If you fancy wasting some time and helping me out, maybe you could compare our one known sighting with the faces in the other pics to see if he is in those too. He ought to be. I’ve put them all on my flickr site.
Just back from a highly marvellous 2 weeks in Canada. Quality times with Sara, skiing, friends and lots of olympics. Good times indeed. The ski highlight was definitely our day Cat Skiing with Fernie Wilderness Adventures.
Like the hand-loom weavers confronted with the first power looms the owners of pound shops around the country must be aghast at this sight. Where do we go from here?
It has been quiet on the blog front recently hasn’t it? There’s a pile of very good excuses reasons for that: principally that I haven’t done much very interesting. And what does the modern man with his finger on the legumes do when he hasn’t done much very interesting? He writes about it on Twitter: http://twitter.com/ateabutnoe. I’ve also added a twitter widget to this page so you can see when I’m having a cup of tea.
I hope there’s no bad luck involved in getting your Christmas blogs up after the 6th of January but I say better late than never.
I can safely say I got exactly what I wanted for Christmas this year because on Christmas morning my beautiful girlfriend arrived at Heathrow terminal 3. We had an emotional reunion like something out of a Richard Curtis movie at the arrivals gate and then a hectic 5 days began. Poor Sara was carted around the country meeting friends and family without ever getting a chance to catch her breath. Well actually we did have a couple of hours at home on Christmas Day but that was full of champagne, smoked salmon and exchanging gifts. Before the jet lag could finish her off we headed over to see my Johnston cousins and catch the tail end of their Christmas dinner. We were just in time for Christmas pudding and the dessert wine so it was very well timed indeed.
On Day 2 we headed out to Cambridgeshire. Not only did I get to introduce Sara to the delights of the Trump and Gold families but also the unmatched joy of a drive through the English countryside listening to Test Match Special. It was a lovely crisp fenland day full of bright sun, good food and excellent company.
When the sun departed Andrew produced Chinese lanterns which we lit and watched rise and disappear into the night: a beautiful end to the day.
The next day was closer to home. We didn’t need to make it any further than Kew Gardens to meet Alex and Jonny, Jess and Tom. It was another cool and crisp day and we did the tree-top walkway which I hadn’t done before. I was glad that Sara got to meet the Cottons and glad that Jess wasn’t sick like the last time we all went to Kew (I think there was some dodgy hot chocolate going around that day).
It was then off to the East End to see Peter, Eleanor, Ellie and Richard. We had a lovely meal and excellent chat although we didn’t get too far with the boardgame I had brought. War on Terror - the game - seems like a fun idea but the rules are by no means clear and maybe none of us were in the best state to make much sense of it by the end. Or maybe that’s the point after all? Anyway it’s the thought that counts.
After that we had a day to ourselves and a chance for a romantic stroll around London: St Paul’s, Tate Modern and the South Bank. It was lovely and thankfully the weather stayed dry if still pretty chilly. But a winter trip to Britain wouldn’t be complete without a cold grey day with some rain and the next day certainly delivered that for our trip to Oxford. If the sightseeing was cold at least we had a very warm welcome with my Aunt Anne and her family. On the way home we also managed to fit in a cup of tea and some delicious cake with my cousin Emily and her family so Sara’s visit proved a wonderful chance to catch up with my family.
And then she was gone. The flying visit was over and the countdown began to my next trip to Canada. Since it’s taken me so long to put finger to keypad to the wait now is only 2 more weeks! Joy!!
My first post after getting back to dear old Blighty spoke of my challenges acclimatising. That didn’t last long; after a week or two I was really feeling back in the swing of the things and starting to appreciate what it was I had come home for. It was great to be back with friends and family, great to be back in pubs over 50 years old, great to be back in the culture that I knew so well. I loved getting out into the countryside too. Green fields and rolling hills like the view from my friend Letty’s kitchen or the wide-open spaces of the Fens at Andy and Jo’s new place in Cambridgeshire give me the most profound sense of comfort and belonging. Before you start to think I’m turning into John Major I was also getting settled into the energy and diversity of London and I enjoyed trips to Manchester and Liverpool as well.
In the very same week that I started to see what it was I had come home for I also had a profound realisation: that none of that mattered as much as being with Sara. I realised that what I really wanted was to be back in Calgary with her! I love her and I can’t imagine being with anyone else. We emailed, we talked it over and we decided to get back together again. We made it official too - by updating our Facebook relationship status! The plan is that I will move back to Calgary next year, probably in the latter half of 2010. I need to sell my flat here and I need to spend some time doing beautiful British things with beautiful British people before I go. And I want to repay some of the support that ThoughtWorks my excellent employers have given me with all these plans.
Ever since that decision was made I have felt a weight off my shoulders. I feel liberated and happy and a strange mix of calm and excitement. It just feels right and it has felt more right every day that has gone past. I’m so lucky to have met someone strong enough to take me back into her life after I left to find out what I really wanted to do. We both agree that I had to do it but it was tough on her and for that I am truly sorry.
Actually right now the calm is giving way to excitement. As I write this Sara is at Calgary Airport and Air Canada permitting she’ll be on her way to London soon! We’ve only got 5 days together but I haven’t been so excited about Christmas for years and years. Just imagine: everything I want for Christmas is flying in over the North Pole to arrive on Christmas Morning. How’s that for a Festivus miracle?
